POLE FOR THE SOUL

I would be lying if I didn't admit to being completely mesmerized the first time I saw a woman perform a striptease.  From the moment I could express myself, I was a performer. It seems I was always drawn to the art of harnessing creativity in an effort to deliver something poignant to an audience, but seeing a performance so blatantly driven by sexuality was nothing short of jarring.  With each layer of clothing  removed, a sense of innocence seemed lost and my ideas about what a woman "should be" were shattered.  The art of the dance was slammed up against the politics and big ideas that were so much a part of the world around me and I couldn't deny it's power in juxtaposition.  Watching the energy of the on-lookers shift as they fell captive to whatever spell the performance seemed to be casting was, in my opinion, magical.  I could never, however, fully reconcile my pre-conceived notions about the countless ladies who have made this their chosen profession until I tried it....

Well, kind of...

My closest friends and I decided to take a pole dancing class at Sheila Kelley's S Factor.  Bare in mind I have shared mostly all of my innermost secrets with these friends, but somehow, in comparison, nothing seemed quite this "intimate".  Besides overcoming any insecurity I might have had in front of my peers, I quickly realized my biggest obstacle was going to be addressing the comfort level I had with myself.  I had no idea what a far bigger battle that would turn out to be and just how vital an element that would be to this class.

The classroom was barely lit, no windows, no mirrors...wait, I am supposed to exercise like this?!  Our instructor, Sue, introduced herself as an S Factor teacher who made her living as an electrical engineer.  My doors were already blown off.  Any stereotype I may have projected onto this pole for fitness phenomenon was immediately shut down.  The simple dichotomy of an engineer teaching me to "work the pole" was off setting. Clearly, I and the 8 other "first-timers" in the room (of all shapes, sizes and colors), had to leave our preconceived notions outside the door. When it was upon us to introduce ourselves and express what brought us to this class, there seemed to be one common thread connecting us...a quest for bettering ourselves.

Sitting on purple mats spread around the room we collectively began to breathe.  The lights dimmed further and music started to pour through speakers and fill the room.  The sweet sounds and emotional melodies that swelled in the space seemed to seep into your skin as you felt your breath deepen and your body start to move.  The movement was gradual, the stretch was slow, the warmth emanated and the muscles continued to engage as the workout progressed.  The music built with momentum and your confidence seemed to follow suit.  Sue's voice guided us every step of the way, teaching us not only how to move but to embrace ourselves for doing so in the integrity of our bodies in that very moment.  For maybe the first time ever, we are not only given permission, but are encouraged to claim and love ourselves in not only our eroticism, but our simple feminine inhabitance.  Like in a guided mediation, we sank further into the abyss of being fully in our bodies while exploring its capacity.  It was blissful, euphoric... I was hooked...and I hadn't even touched a pole, yet!

There they were...long, gleaming, gold poles that reached floor to ceiling throughout the room.  Though the medal they were made of weren't magnetic, they seemed to somehow pull me in.  However, just as modern sky scrapers can be, they were towering, intimidating and seemingly insurmountable.  I felt like a child that was slightly fearful, but very curious.  I really wanted to just be able to jump on, crawl up and play with the big shiny things, but knew this would take some time.  I started the clock when I learned my first trick, the "firefly".  We were taught to hook our foot around the pole and fall into a spin that would send us flying around it.  I couldn't get my head around the idea that I was supposed to fly but was told to fall.  This seemed to sum up my entire experience of participating in this class.  I had to trust myself and take a blind leap into the unknown to experience the exhilaration that resulted.

It has been 6 months since my toe first dipped into the pool of pole dancing and all things S Factor. I am pleased to report that I am now swimming safely in the deep end, diving off the diving board and throwing in an occasional cannonball (in S language that's doing a descending angel, snake and ballerina/pole bend)!  I  am by no means an expert but that gives me so much to look forward to.  I don't believe this is a path that can ever reach an end.

I now belong to a community of women that are empowered and unapologetic about it.  I am surrounded by ladies that support one another and acknowledge each other's beauty and magnificence.  I am following my bliss by letting my soul, mind and body live in that space.  I am making an impact on the world by living as an example of a female immersed in self acceptance.  I choose to breathe and dance through this life with a perspective of love, gratitude and beauty because that is what S Factor has awakened me to.

Now when I watch a striptease, I am still in shock and awe but, only of the beauty and the power and the courage it takes to perform it.  I can appreciate it fully because I know that each movement is a gift, a choice made, to carry on a conversation with anyone lucky enough to be in view.  S Factor is truly a "movement" in every sense of the word. I believe, as with the generations of women who have danced before us, it is here to stay.

Some of my favorite pole-related sites:
www.sfactor.com
www.aerialamy.com
www.girlnextdoorshow.com

Why blogger?

Our family got it’s first computer when I was in grade school.  My father was always a tech-aholic so I am pretty sure we were the first house on the culdesac with one.  Dad always valued the skill of writing above most others.  We would stay up nights (especially ones before I had a paper due) typing away leaving blood, sweat and tears on the gigantic keyboard.  Over the years the computers got smaller, the essays grew longer and the vocabulary expanded.  My technique evolved and served me well but was always a means to an end rather than an enjoyable pass time.

Just as the computer had years ago, the internet jumped on the scene and became all the rage.  It was the field of dreams, the world was built and the bloggers came.  I couldn’t understand the sensation blogs had created.  I mean who really wants to hear the ranting, raving and random thought of everyone with access to the internet?  Why would anyone write JUST to write?  Like most unanswered questions, I lived my way into the answer.

Not long ago, a dear friend of mine suggested I enter the ranks and find my rightful place among the legions of bloggers.  She urged me, “you are such an original voice with incredible life experiences to share and you are a talented writer…why not?”  Of course my inner child quipped back that no one in their right mind would bother to pay attention.  What could I possibly say that anyone would have a vested interest in?  As quickly as those thoughts began to fester, it became less of a  query and more of a challenge.  I should have something to say, and if I don’t then I have bigger problems to worry about than blogging…like getting a life!

I believe we ALL have something to say.  A story to tell.  A secret to reveal.  A life less ordinary.   We can all benefit from peeling back a layer and revealing something the world may not yet know.  So I decide the take the reigns and charge ahead into the new frontier of cyberspace.  

Los Angeles is the city of dreams where devastation and miracles are often handed out on street corners (just ask pretty woman)!  Living in LA LA Land has certainly afforded me a truth stranger than fiction.  These eyes have seen some things and these ears have heard a few more and since I was there when the tree fell in the forrest, I will gladly tell you where it landed and the noise it made.  If I wasn't planning on divulging such information, then...why blogger?

Like most beginnings, I don't know where this "lane" will lead.  I liken the experience to that of raising a child.  You love it, nurture it, even fear for it and eventually send it out into the world with the hopes it will make you proud.  My intentions are to share and possibly even inspire.  Like anything I do that could pass or fail, this blog will eventually be filed under the old adage my grandmother repeats ad nauseum ..."you will never regret the things you do, only the things you don't do". 

Is it haute in here?

It is truly amazing how much can happen in a short span of time.  I don't know about you, but I can't even get through a song on the radio without completely derailing my line of thinking and arriving some place completely foreign mentally that I never could have expected.  These past few weeks the band has played on and things have certainly spun me in new directions, landing me in unplanned and unfamiliar territory.  Rather like a road trip gone awry, I am trying to enjoy the process of "being lost" because it's typically the unforeseen parts of the journey that always seem to be the most fulfilling.


A few weeks back I was scanning a local newsletter geared towards mommies in Los Angeles and the San Fernando Valley (yes, I said mommies and no, you can't comment).  There was a posting somewhere between swimming lessons and divorce support groups for a business opportunity.  A well known, local salon & spa was looking to rent out a retail space in their Woodland Hills branch.  All it took were two little words..."boutique wanted"....and I was sold.  I immediately became victim to delusions of grandeur starring me as the successful entrepreneur.  


As quickly as the excitement swelled. the reality set in.  The inevitable questions fueled by self doubt crept in to take their ever-present stage.  How could I possibly find the time to run a small business, let alone afford it?  Oh, and did I mention I have zero experience in retail or business management?  But, wait...I love shopping, clothes, accessories, fashion and girl time at the salon...there has to be something to this.  Suddenly, it all became clear, this was an opportunity to have the things I'm passionate become a part of my growth process.  Allowing play to bleed into work is typically a challenge yet almost always guarantees success when done in the proper spirit.  It is time for a merging of happiness and prosperity.  I call the girls, the ones who I know won't hesitate to gamble on the upshot of fashion infused madness.


As usual, in less than a minute, Amy, Trina and I were all on the same page.  We would spend our free time shopping together anyway so why not do it for a living?  Granted, we may not retire on it, but there is more to profit than just dollars and cents.  We could have a whole store dedicated to dressing up the world in our style, sort of like having our very own adult dollhouse.  We get to hunt and gather and give back all in one fowl swoop.  The best part, we can lean on each other for the love and support these ventures require.  Whether needing more help, a word of advice, a shoulder to cry on, a wallet to open or a smile to crack, what better partner to turn to than a best friend?  Some say business and pleasure don't mix well, but I am here to tell you from experience that is far from true and had I believed it, I would have missed out on some miracles.  


So, here we are, it's a few weeks past reading a random posting and the doors to Haute Stuff Boutique are officially open.  It has been a whirlwind of late nights, learning curves and it's just the beginning.  I am filled with hope while managing my expectations.  I am excited about the journey and fearful about the outcome.  I am overwhelmed with the feed back and grateful for all the support.  Mostly, I feel lucky.  Lucky to have an opportunity to live in a place and time that not only allows me, but encourages me to live my dreams.  I am blessed to have such incredible friends to share my life with and I am humbled to have manifested all of this for myself.    


Unlike Dorothy...I like living in this crazy dream because it is my masterpiece....I hope I don't ever have to go home!


HAUTE STUFF BOUTIQUE
20855 Ventura Blvd. Suite 6
Woodland Hills CA 91364


Grand Opening: June 18, 2011 - details to come!!!